I’m not good enough seems to be the subjacent limiting belief, the bottom line personal lie that most of us is living by.
You may think it’s another limiting belief what has you stuck in a job, a relationship, a life you don’t want to live, but it isn’t; it’s I’m not good enough what has you stuck.
You may think it’s your fear what doesn’t let you take action, make changes and create the life you dream about, but it isn’t; it’s I’m not good enough what’s behind your fear.
That’s your monster, that’s my monster!!
When you think I can’t have that, I can’t live like that, I can’t have a job that’s rewarding financially and emotionally, what’s behind is I AM NOT GOOD ENOUGH to deserve/have/live that.
It’s you, it’s me, your friend, your sister, your boss, your spouse, even that powerful people who bullies others with their power, we all have this subjacent limiting belief, and it’s this lie what is keeping you awake at night, what doesn’t let you make that call, write that email, enrol in that training, make that change, take action to regain control of your life, define what success or a fulfilling life means to you, dream about the life you want to live and then go and pursue it.
But, it is a lie
I’m not good enough is just a lie. Setting aside the fact that God made you to his resemblance, let’s review the evidence you have in front of you. You have already finished your studies, maybe even with honours or got postgraduate degrees; your friends come to you for advice, support or knowledge on certain areas; you have landed several jobs, gone up on the corporate ladder or run your own business; you have a car, a house, more than enough clothes and stuff in your house; you may even have travelled the world. So, you are more than good enough, that’s what the REAL EVIDENCE shows.
Therefore if you contrast the thought vs the evidence, which one do you think is real and which one is a lie?
I don’t know if this is your case, but from my own experience and what I witness with clients, some successful people believes they can’t have the life they wish they could have.
When you ask people how would their life be, if it were ideal? What would they be? What would they be doing? Where would they be? Or ask them where do they want their life to go? In most of the cases they’ll answer: they are too old to dream, they have to be realistic, they don’t know what they want for their life.
And why is that?
Because they believe they aren’t good enough to have a perfect life, an ideal job/house/relationship/health/weight/etc., etc., etc.
I haven’t found yet when we specifically begun to believe this lie, maybe it was when as little babies we needed help to eat, stay clean, get things done; or perhaps later at school when we were learning to read, write, socialize, add numbers, etc. all at the same time.
But, what I have found is that whenever I’m struggling with something, whenever I’m feeling stuck or that I’ll not able to reach what I want or that what I want is unachievable, this silly lie is behind these feelings. It takes different shapes and comes as:
|· I’m too old||· I am a woman||· Nobody knows me|
|· I don’t have enough experience||· Who will pay that amount?||· I need to learn more|
|· I can’t find where my ideal client is||· I’m Latino and get a strong accent||· I’m not thin/pretty/tall enough|
Or in the form of doubt:
|· What if I fail?||· What if I’m wrong?||· What if I lose my money?|
|· What if nobody signs in, hires me, likes me?||· What if I can’t get the right clients?||· What if I’m sending the wrong message?|
You may have experienced these thoughts or different ones, but if you’re hesitating on what the next action should be, or you think you can’t have the life you’ll love to live or the job you’d like to have, or the relationship of your dreams or you don’t even dare to dream, then the lie I’m not good enough is behind your fear, your indecision, your doubt.
If that is the case, take a moment, review your life and see what you have achieved, done, learnt so far. I’m sure you’ll find lots of evidence that YOU ARE MORE THAN GOOD ENOUGH and if you have been good enough to achieve your goals in the past, you’re enough to do it again.
Set what you want for you and for your life; what you want to be, do and have; the job you want to get; the life you want to live. There is a caveat here, make sure you’re clear of the reasons why you want it, be sure it’s your own why, not your family’s, spouse’s, friend’s or boss’s one.
In addition you can use this affirmation while you define what you want, plan how to get it and begin to take steps towards it, or whenever you’re doubtful:
“I AM GOOD ENOUGH, I’M DOING ENOUGH AND HAVING ENOUGH, ALWAYS”
You can write it down, sing it, repeat it as frequently as you want, put post its with it every where, write it with lipstick on your mirror… it’s up to you how to dismantle this main limiting belief, let’s create a I’M GOOD ENOUGH Movement.